This is not possible. The stroke will always be adding to the object's size, because if it wouldn't, that would actually mean that the object itself is shrunk. A stroke is put on the path that builds the object, and it extends to both sides of the path.
You can, however, copy the object to the clipboard before you make the stroke wider, and then use 'Edit > Paste size > Paste size' for quick resizing back to the previous size.
Or you could use two circles, and make the inner circle smaller, to get a wider 'rim'.